Conduct Unbecoming?!!?

According to this hilarious report from Reuters, looks like we aren't the only ones who enjoy a little whack!

It ain't the Easter Bunny

Question:

Who looks like a presidental candidate and tastes delicious ???

What's Under Your Bed?

A survey of the things people find under their beds turned up some bizarre results, from sweaty socks to sex toys.

LATEX + LEATHER = DELICIOUSNESS

So who's down for a little BDSM ???
Bust out the lotion and give it a whack.

Our management isn't too happy about us posting it, but they can suck it. Enjoy it while you can - it will be up until those slimeballs kick the door in. haha.

Tales from The Record Industry - V.0.1

It just keeps getting better and better ...

The RIAA (Recording Assocication of America) has been voted "THE WORST COMPANY IN AMERICA 2007" beating out Halliburton and a host of others. We stand utterly , dumbfounded as to what could possibly make people despise the RIAA so much. It remains a mystery to us. Shame on you for being such bad consumers!

Now go out and get that "record deal" !!!

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Support Indie Music or be force-fed crap!
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Your ol' pals, JaGoFF
Download it. Burn it. Share it.
if you dig...
Buy it. Burn it. Share it.
We won't sue your a$$.

An all too real case of Deja Vu

Here come the sheeple.

The World Can't Wait

Simply put: this woman is a badass!

Rule #1: Acquire Thy Enemy

If you can't beat 'em .. buy 'em.

Now, it all makes sense...

finally, someone has come up with an explanation.

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Well, today marks four years since the begining of the war.
since then...

over half a million people have died with twice that many having been mamed, injured or orphaned. Meanwhile, in the "real world", Halliburton is moving to Dubai, New Orleans is still in ruins, Britney's gone bald, Anna Nicole died leaving a dozen people fighting for her baby and "Dancing with the Stars" starts tonight...

Now that's progress.

...and this says it ALL!
PRAYING TO THE PUMP at the WAILING WELL:

If it smells like crap...

Looks like crap
and sounds like crap
then it must be crap.
(or at least smell as good as another dog's ass).

FREAKEND : FLESH FOR FANTASY / MIAMI - SOLD OUT!!!

FREAKEND : FLESH FOR FANTASY :
March 23 -25th / MIAMI
SOLD OUT!!!

Following the success of last year's over the top, raunch fest, FREAKEND : MIAMI has invited JaGoFF back again. This year's outing is scheduled on land for the first 24 hours and day 2 takes us into international waters ... so bring plenty of sun-screen and and all of your favorite toys. Expect massive booty, bass and even more booty - it's gonna be a dripping wet, pretty mess.
For those members attending here's the lowdown n' dirty:
------------------------------------------
Featuring :

JaGoFF performing LIVE
w/ - Lady J &. Teacher's Pet strappin' on the big boss.

Fetish Fashion Show.

Erotic Ball.

Naked sushi buffet.

The legendary banana eating contest.

Cherry Jello Wrestling Smackdown
w/ guest referee Dildo: The World's Happiest Clown.

A naughty buffet of Honey, Strawberries, Whipped Cream, Banannas, Chocolate Syrup, Cherries, Cucumbers & Ice Cubes will be provided for your delicious pleasure. It's all you can eat - Hope your hungry. ;)

12" inch bootytech marathon.

PLUS, everything that you have come to know and love in one deliciously discreet and sinfully secluded location.
---------------------------------
Fri, March 23rd:
7PM - Gates Open.
8PM-10PM - Lick to get to know you better & Naked Sushi Buffet
10PM - Gates close. Let the festivities begin.
11PM - Jello Wrestling Smackdown.
1AM - JaGoFF
2AM - Fetish Fashion Show
3AM - ? Bootytech until sunrise.
---------------------------------
Sat, March 24th:
10AM - Breakfast is served.
12PM - All aboard The Love Boat
1PM - The Love Boat leaves for open sea.
3PM - Meet your NEW Mommy.
8PM - Festish Ball until sunrise.
11PM - JaGoFF performs
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Sun, March 25th:
9AM - Freakend arrives back on land.

GO HOME.

What to bring:
--------------------------
Sunscreen
Lotion (all flavors)
Latex (all colors)
Toys (all sizes)
Extra batteries (rechargable = better)
Spurs Chaps
Stirrups Straps
Whips
Clips
Clamps
10 Gallon Hats!
any & all toys welcome.
--------------------------
Once the gates lock at 10PM, no entry will be allowed. Members are welcome to leave at anytime, however there is no re-entry. No exceptions.

As always, Freakend is a themed, MEMBERS ONLY EVENT, 21 and OVER and NO CAMERAS PLEASE (this includes cellphones!). What happens at Freakend, stays at Freakend. Sorry, ONLY TICKET HOLDING MEMBERS will be allowed entry. Their rules, not ours. See your A$$E$ there.

We're gonna FUNK you up!

Great News!

Freedom isn't free... but it is now half price!

That a boy (part 2)

This is the latest installment in our ongoing series of heart-warming stories like this one, that make us want to spread our seed.

Any takers???

That a boy (part 1)

It is heart-warming stories like this one, , that make us want to spread our seed.

Any takers???

READING BETWEEN THE LINES

After past trials in the areas of music , advertising, gaming and even spam ... there is new evidence that subliminal advertising works.

in that case ...

!!! yenom su dnes dna DC ruo yuB

Let's get it on !!!!

This gives a whole new meaning to the World Wildlife Federation.

FEAR ITSELF

God bless the Unlimited Security Apparatus!

Home of the brave (and seriously paranoid).

Soul Food Anyone?

Apparently, rice now qualifies.

We wonder if it screams when you boil it.

Anyway, all this talk of food is bringing on the indigestion...
Better take something for it.

Crap in. Crap Out.

Beyond writing a great songs and paying attention to production, many acts overlook the importance of proper mastering - while there is no substitute for getting your music properly mastered, you can make your life far less complicated by paying attention to sonic details before the mastering process. The bottom line is the better your final product, the better the outcome, on the flipside ... crap in, crap out. To make a long story short, here is a great series of articles entitled, "Audio Mastering: Tips for Sonic Excellence". It is well worth the read. Enjoy. Here are 3 of the 4 part series.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

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Many thanks to the folks at TheRecordIndustry.com for turning us on.
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Support indie music or be force-fed crap!

And so it begins... (again)

... put another log on the fire.



Support Indie Music or be force-fed CRAP!!!